REFUGEES AT HOME
Refugees at Home is a small UK-based organisation that connects people with a spare room in their home with asylum-seekers and refugees in need of accommodation.
Inspirational teenager welcomes refugees into her home
Interview by Vicki Felgate
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I’m in a leafy suburb in the South West London/Surrey borders and off to meet Refugees at Home’s youngest host, 19 year-old Bryony.
She opens the door to her flat holding a 3 month-old baby, who I soon discover is the son of her current guest – a young woman from Albania. Bryony is one of the few hosts to take women and their children into her home. Here I find out what inspired her to become a host. |
Image: Bryony Farmer
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How long have you been involved with Refugees at Home?
I’ve been a host since February this year (2016). I was one of their first hosts. I remember I applied just before New Year’s Eve last year. I had a home visit early February and my first guest a few weeks later. It was very quick.
How many refugees have you hosted in that time?
I’ve had four guests [plus children] so far. I tend to do longer term hosting, primarily for mums with children, which is unusual. It’s mostly single men or single women who come through the system. But I seem to have ended up with all the children… because my background is working with kids.
My first guest, a woman from Eritrea, was with me for just 3 days. My second was a mum fleeing the war in Syria with her little boy. They were here for 4 months. Then I had a mum with a 2 year-old for a week. And my current guests, Lena (not her real name) and her baby, will be with me for around 6 months.
What made you decide to open up your home to refugees in the beginning?
I was aware [through social media and the news]… of people coming to the UK and needing support… I knew that historically, during wars, people took in children who were evacuated from the cities. And I thought there must be something similar out there for [today’s] refugees.
I’d just moved into this flat and I had a spare room. So I decided to host. I bought a bed, a mattress and sheets and I thought ‘right that’s it, I’ve got to do it now’ and that was that… two months after applying to Refugees at Home I had my first guest.
That shows how much need there is… the speed with which Refugees at Home placed someone with you?
There’s a real need, particularly in this area… because Kingston University offers a special English language course for refugees, and people need accommodation nearby. That’s what this little one’s mum is doing (Bryony has been holding the baby of her current guest throughout our chat).
Did you have any concerns before agreeing to host?
I was worried about theft… and just about who I was going to get… not knowing who’s coming through the door. I think these are normal worries that most people would have. But I’ve been absolutely fine… I think [my guests] are more nervous than me at the beginning.
I’ve done some emergency hosting… where the refugee agency will call and say ‘we’ve got someone that needs hosting tonight’ and you won’t meet them until they arrive. But… in those instances I agree to just the weekend [and extend if I feel comfortable after that].
But if it’s someone who needs placing for longer term… you have the opportunity to meet them first and see if you get along. Then you can either say yes or no. I’ve chosen to only host women… because I’m a single woman living on my own… and that’s what I feel comfortable with.
What’s been the hardest thing about hosting?
I think the first week is the hardest… simply because you’ve got someone new in your house and you’re having to adjust to that. Deciding what boundaries to put down… working out food shopping… and cleaning… I ask [guests] to keep the flat clean and reasonably tidy – although I understand with children that it’s not always possible. But we work together as a team and it definitely gets easier after the first few weeks.
…and the most rewarding thing?
I love seeing people progress on… For example, this little one (Bryony’s referring to the son of one of her previous guests who she’s also looking after so that his mum can attend a University course) couldn’t talk much when he first came here. He was behind in his development and he had a number of [health] issues. We took him to the GP to sort out his health problems… and then just having some stability [in his life] made a difference to his development.
I haven’t kept in touch with my short-term guests. But the long-term ones… you definitely stay in touch and form a connection with them and you just see them progress… with their English, with their understanding of how things work and it’s the best way, I think, to help them integrate.
What support do you get from Refugees at Home?
Refugees at Home provided a home visitor [at the beginning] who I’m still in contact with. When I have a new guest, she calls me to ask if everything’s ok… if there are any problems. If I’m concerned about a guest’s mental health for example… not only can I refer to the GP but I can also mention it to her. Refugees at Home don’t provide psychological support [for guests] at the moment. But they… can point you in the right direction and tell you who to contact. I can call them anytime, about anything, which is really nice.
There’s no financial support. It’s not like fostering for example, where you get a weekly amount. That’s not the case [with Refugees at Home] – although they are trying to set up a travel card scheme for guests… to fund travel to meet lawyers, to study and to stay connected with friends.
But you can specify whether you can provide food… or just housing. If the guest isn’t eligible for benefits and has no access to funds at all… then [Refugees at Home] won’t place them with someone who can’t provide some financial support. In the beginning, almost all of the guests need a bit help… but the long-term ones… over time… it’s fine. You might occasionally need to buy some clothes, but that’s it.
What would you say to other people considering becoming a host?
I’d say ‘call them up and arrange for a home visit’… use it as an opportunity to find out more. Write down any questions or concerns you have… and ask your home visitor. Or come to a meeting… there’s one every couple of months that anyone can come along to. It’s a great opportunity to meet hosts and guests and find out more [about hosting].
There are no strict criteria to be a host. You can be single or in a relationship. There’s no maximum age or minimum age. I was 18 when I started hosting… the oldest is 94. If you’ve got a spare room (or even just a sofa bed for an emergency case)… that’s all you need.
I’ve been a host since February this year (2016). I was one of their first hosts. I remember I applied just before New Year’s Eve last year. I had a home visit early February and my first guest a few weeks later. It was very quick.
How many refugees have you hosted in that time?
I’ve had four guests [plus children] so far. I tend to do longer term hosting, primarily for mums with children, which is unusual. It’s mostly single men or single women who come through the system. But I seem to have ended up with all the children… because my background is working with kids.
My first guest, a woman from Eritrea, was with me for just 3 days. My second was a mum fleeing the war in Syria with her little boy. They were here for 4 months. Then I had a mum with a 2 year-old for a week. And my current guests, Lena (not her real name) and her baby, will be with me for around 6 months.
What made you decide to open up your home to refugees in the beginning?
I was aware [through social media and the news]… of people coming to the UK and needing support… I knew that historically, during wars, people took in children who were evacuated from the cities. And I thought there must be something similar out there for [today’s] refugees.
I’d just moved into this flat and I had a spare room. So I decided to host. I bought a bed, a mattress and sheets and I thought ‘right that’s it, I’ve got to do it now’ and that was that… two months after applying to Refugees at Home I had my first guest.
That shows how much need there is… the speed with which Refugees at Home placed someone with you?
There’s a real need, particularly in this area… because Kingston University offers a special English language course for refugees, and people need accommodation nearby. That’s what this little one’s mum is doing (Bryony has been holding the baby of her current guest throughout our chat).
Did you have any concerns before agreeing to host?
I was worried about theft… and just about who I was going to get… not knowing who’s coming through the door. I think these are normal worries that most people would have. But I’ve been absolutely fine… I think [my guests] are more nervous than me at the beginning.
I’ve done some emergency hosting… where the refugee agency will call and say ‘we’ve got someone that needs hosting tonight’ and you won’t meet them until they arrive. But… in those instances I agree to just the weekend [and extend if I feel comfortable after that].
But if it’s someone who needs placing for longer term… you have the opportunity to meet them first and see if you get along. Then you can either say yes or no. I’ve chosen to only host women… because I’m a single woman living on my own… and that’s what I feel comfortable with.
What’s been the hardest thing about hosting?
I think the first week is the hardest… simply because you’ve got someone new in your house and you’re having to adjust to that. Deciding what boundaries to put down… working out food shopping… and cleaning… I ask [guests] to keep the flat clean and reasonably tidy – although I understand with children that it’s not always possible. But we work together as a team and it definitely gets easier after the first few weeks.
…and the most rewarding thing?
I love seeing people progress on… For example, this little one (Bryony’s referring to the son of one of her previous guests who she’s also looking after so that his mum can attend a University course) couldn’t talk much when he first came here. He was behind in his development and he had a number of [health] issues. We took him to the GP to sort out his health problems… and then just having some stability [in his life] made a difference to his development.
I haven’t kept in touch with my short-term guests. But the long-term ones… you definitely stay in touch and form a connection with them and you just see them progress… with their English, with their understanding of how things work and it’s the best way, I think, to help them integrate.
What support do you get from Refugees at Home?
Refugees at Home provided a home visitor [at the beginning] who I’m still in contact with. When I have a new guest, she calls me to ask if everything’s ok… if there are any problems. If I’m concerned about a guest’s mental health for example… not only can I refer to the GP but I can also mention it to her. Refugees at Home don’t provide psychological support [for guests] at the moment. But they… can point you in the right direction and tell you who to contact. I can call them anytime, about anything, which is really nice.
There’s no financial support. It’s not like fostering for example, where you get a weekly amount. That’s not the case [with Refugees at Home] – although they are trying to set up a travel card scheme for guests… to fund travel to meet lawyers, to study and to stay connected with friends.
But you can specify whether you can provide food… or just housing. If the guest isn’t eligible for benefits and has no access to funds at all… then [Refugees at Home] won’t place them with someone who can’t provide some financial support. In the beginning, almost all of the guests need a bit help… but the long-term ones… over time… it’s fine. You might occasionally need to buy some clothes, but that’s it.
What would you say to other people considering becoming a host?
I’d say ‘call them up and arrange for a home visit’… use it as an opportunity to find out more. Write down any questions or concerns you have… and ask your home visitor. Or come to a meeting… there’s one every couple of months that anyone can come along to. It’s a great opportunity to meet hosts and guests and find out more [about hosting].
There are no strict criteria to be a host. You can be single or in a relationship. There’s no maximum age or minimum age. I was 18 when I started hosting… the oldest is 94. If you’ve got a spare room (or even just a sofa bed for an emergency case)… that’s all you need.
I left the meeting with Bryony feeling inspired. That someone so young is not only aware of the current refugee crisis, but willing to open up her home to help those caught up in it.
She showed me that the fears people (including me) commonly have about hosting are unfounded... that by seeking information and tapping into the support that Refugees at Home offer to their hosts, these fears can be overcome.
I'd encourage anyone even contemplating hosting to take that next step, to find out more. I mean, if Bryony can do it, so can we, right?
She showed me that the fears people (including me) commonly have about hosting are unfounded... that by seeking information and tapping into the support that Refugees at Home offer to their hosts, these fears can be overcome.
I'd encourage anyone even contemplating hosting to take that next step, to find out more. I mean, if Bryony can do it, so can we, right?
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